Shiva in the hut, the inmates: yoga classes were banned in Russian prisons

If in the decaying West they eat red fish and play video games in prisons, then in Russian they take care, first of all, about spiritual health. The other day, they showed special care about the capital's convicts — they abolished yoga classes. As it turned out, smart people say that even boys should not get carried away with this — no matter what happens later.

Yoga classes were stopped in Moscow pre-trial detention centers in connection with the appeal of Senator Elena Mizulina to the Prosecutor General's Office. The caring official became concerned about the prisoners, like her own mother, after receiving an alarming letter from the theologian professor Alexander Dvorkin. In his message to the senator, this well-known scientist proves on several pages that yoga and other similar oriental practices often cause sexual arousal in the inmates, which they do not need at all.

Having done enough yoga and received a good charge of prana, the inhabitants of the pre-trial detention center can covet their neighbor, and this, as you know, in places of imprisonment, is fraught with sodomy and other not too Orthodox acts. In short, in Moscow prisons, which are a stronghold of chastity and culture, bourgeois practices can cause an outbreak of uncontrolled homosexuality.

The luminary of theology brought a solid platform under his theory. It became known to him that yoga is mainly practiced in the pre-trial detention center by prisoners from the economic service unit. Dworkin suggested that sooner or later they would all change their orientation, which would lead to the most serious consequences. Other prison residents will not want to eat food cooked by gays, and everything will end in hunger strikes and riots.

Prisoners recklessly decided to teach yoga in 2018. The first to participate in the experiment was women's isolation ward No. 6, and then "Butyrka" joined. In order to prevent amateur activity, a professional instructor Alexey Merkulov was involved, who conducted the classes. Sergei Telyatnikov, the head of Butyrskaya prison, noted the positive effect of yoga on prisoners, who, according to him, were able to "relax and get rid of accumulated negativity."

This would have continued the corruption by yoga of everyone in a row, if the good geniuses Elena Mizulina and Alexander Dvorkin had not intervened. The latter, by the way, is a connoisseur of sects, a teacher of the Orthodox St. Tikhon Humanitarian University (it turns out there is one) and a passionate fighter against filth.

PS: In the end, the FSIN promised to return yoga classes suspended due to complaints about "homosexual relations" to the pre-trial detention center. The deputy head of the FSIN stressed that "we have no right to condemn" homosexuals. In his opinion, the theologian professor Alexander Dvorkin, whose letter formed the basis of Mizulina's complaint, "lives by outdated concepts."