5 of the most idiotic reasons for war in history

The reasons for any war are always serious: long years of misunderstanding and territorial claims, thirst for power and economic instability. But the reason can be the most idiotic, for example, a pig that went into a potato field, or a stolen wooden bucket, or a dog that ran across the border.

Here you will find the five most striking and ridiculous episodes that turned the wars into a tragicomedy.

The war over the wooden bucket

Definitely the first place in terms of idiocy among the reasons for war. A massacre that cost thousands of lives, all for the sake of bringing back the most ordinary oak bucket.

XIV century, two neighboring city-states of northern Italy — Bologna and Modena-live on the verge of conflict. Bologna supports the Guelph party, and Modena supports their worst enemies, the Ghibellines. The distance between them is small, about 50 kilometers, in general, at any moment an enemy army can come running and start a massacre. And the slaughter began, but the reason for it was found the most ridiculous.

According to one version (more stupid), a certain cavalryman-mercenary deserted from Bologna to Modena and along the way took with him a wooden bucket from a well. The government of Bologna demanded the return of the bucket, since it is municipal, and therefore common, property.

Here's the bucket

According to another version (a little less shameful), there were several cavalrymen, and their wooden bucket was not empty — there were valuables obtained by looting ordinary Bolognese. In any case, the offended party asked to return the bucket. Because they did not think about the inviolability of private property at that time, but stealing the public domain of the city is already out of the question.

The altercation began. The diplomats did not agree, and the guns had to agree. During the decisive Battle of Zappolino, 2,000 soldiers were killed. Modena won by defending the bucket. It is still kept in the city as a relic. The mini-state has not received any other acquisitions. Just the damn bucket.

The war over the desecrated cakes

The stereotypical modern Mexican loves spicy food. The stereotypical Mexican of the XIX century also hates everything sweet. At least, during the street riots in 1828, Mexican officers for some reason destroyed the confectionery shop of a French citizen.

Cakes and pies were trampled on, the store was vandalized, furniture was broken, dishes were smashed, and chocolate fondue was treated in a way that I'm ashamed to say. The Frenchman demanded compensation and in his requests reached the highest court — the native king Louis-Philippe I. He was imbued with the troubles of a simple pastry chef and announced an ultimatum to Mexico: to give the victim 60 thousand pesos. The amount at that time was simply exorbitant.

And in order for the Mexicans to understand the seriousness of their intentions, the king also demanded the return of all the money that Mexico owed to France. The ultimatum was ignored, and Louis Philippe I effectively declared war: his fleet blocked the port of Veracruz and began bombing the fortress of San Juan de Ulua.

In response, the Mexicans imposed martial law and tried to enlist the support of Texas, which was then an independent state. Realizing that the impoverished country could not compete with France, Mexico accepted the demands and paid off its debts. I shouldn't have trampled on the cakes.

The war over the pig

The British-American conflict, which almost turned into a real war. And all this because of a pig that went into a potato field.

On June 15, 1846, Britain and the United States signed the Treaty of Oregon, which defined the borders of the states off the coast of the Pacific Ocean. In theory, the document was supposed to clarify the situation and get rid of omissions, but only confused everything even worse. As it turned out, the maps of the region were inaccurate, and both states considered the San Juan Islands their own territory. As a result, both British and American colonists began to settle here. Both of them, of course, considered each other illegal immigrants.

On June 15, 1859, exactly 13 years later, as ordered, it all turned into one of the stupidest conflicts in history.

On this day, American farmer Liman Cutler saw a huge black pig on his land, which was swarming in his garden and eating potatoes. The pig did this not for the first time: first Liman drove it away with kicks, then with a stick, but this time he could not stand it, went home for a gun and shot the boar.

It turned out that the animal belongs to a local Irishman named Charles Griffin. The problem is that both farmers were citizens of different states. When the ordinary rural conflict came to a scandal, both men went to ask for help from representatives of their authorities. And they reacted to the incident with the pig unexpectedly violently.

The Americans landed four hundred soldiers on the island. The British did not lag behind and sent five ships with two thousand soldiers on board. The governor of the British colony ordered Rear Admiral Robert Baynes to launch military operations if the Americans did not leave the territory. Fortunately, the officer disobeyed the leadership and thus saved the country from war. The soldiers of the United States and Britain amused themselves for days on end by insulting each other, but they strictly followed the order not to open fire first.

British troops on San Juan Island

When the war over the black pig got out in London and Washington, they grabbed their heads and agreed to a truce. To prevent the conflict, neutral arbitrators were brought in, led by the German Emperor Wilhelm I, who decided the dispute over the boar in favor of the United States-the islands went to them.

The war over the dog

A similar, but more tragic story happened on the border of Greece and Bulgaria in 1925. Only it all started not with a pig, but with a stray mangy dog who decided to escape across the border.

Relations between the two countries were extremely tense: in the First World War, they fought on different sides, plus each had territorial claims. In addition, anti-Greek partisan groups have become widespread in Bulgaria. One of these groups actually seized power in the area of the city of Petrich on the border. It was a state within a state, the border territory was managed by the "Internal Macedonian Revolutionary Organization". This is where the conflict occurred.

On October 18, a lured dog escaped from one of the Greek border guards. And this fool ran not somewhere, but across the border. The soldier went to look for his dog and, right at the intersection of states, was shot by patrolmen from Petrich. When the Greek outpost officer found out, he went to investigate, but was also killed on the spot. Other skirmishes have been reported, but both sides still blame each other.

Greek Army

The story came out ugly. Greece has demanded an official apology and compensation for the families of the victims. Bulgaria never responded in the 48 hours it was given, and Greek troops invaded the vicinity of Petrich. Several border villages were captured, and the city itself was almost taken in battle. Fortunately, the League of Nations (the prototype of the UN of those years) intervened and the war was stopped. And now Greece was obliged to pay compensation for the inconvenience and 50 dead Bulgarians.

The dog, as far as we know, was never found. Probably scared of the cannonade and ran away with the ends.

Football War

We once talked about one of the most ridiculous conflicts in history — the "Football War" between El Salvador and Honduras. Back then, losing a football match killed thousands of people, and both countries fell into a protracted crisis.

In 1970, football teams from El Salvador and Honduras were trying to qualify for the World Cup finals, and the sports rage was fueled by the long-standing hostility of the two states. It all turned into a shameful story: the victory of El Salvador on its own field led to the fact that the locals, who believed in their strength, first began to massively beat the Hondurans, and then completely attacked the neighbors with rather vague demands.

The war itself began with Salvadoran planes crossing the airspace of a neighbor, and ended with a massacre, the destruction of the infrastructure of both countries and the intervention of neighboring states, which promised El Salvador such an economic blockade that it will never recover.

By the way, it was the "Football War" that became the last military conflict in which aircraft from the Second World War were actively used. The countries were not very rich, so they were forced to buy old things, which the pilots of other countries were simply afraid to fly.