Statistics of the innermost: 7 scientific facts about sexual fantasies
Scientists are getting deeper into the depths of our psychology and have already taken up the most intimate — sexual fantasies. Maybe it's not bad that the secrets of our consciousness are getting smaller, but it's a little uncomfortable when dissecting the innermost. Dr. Justin Lemiller, author of the book "Tell Me What You Want" (Tell Me What You Want) studied common sexual fantasies and told the world about them. Here are 7 facts presented by the doctor that you will surely be interested in.
Dr. Lemiller's conclusions are based on a study of 4,175 Americans of different genders, ages and sexual orientations living in 50 US states, so they claim to be reliable.
The partner with whom a person is in a relationship is the most frequent object of sexual fantasies. For singles, this is usually a former partner. This is somewhat strange, because it has always been believed that fantasies are a way to escape from reality. Lemiller claims that outsiders also appear in fantasies, but if you believe the survey, then much less often.
Most people are not ready to see themselves in sexual fantasies as they are. Almost always we imagine ourselves to be different, more perfect, and much depends on gender. Men see themselves with other genitals (of course, more), and women tend to invent a more perfect figure for themselves. As for character, it is typical for the fair sex to present themselves as dominant, and for guys to obey.
Of all the fantasies of a sexual nature, the most common is threesome sex. But Dr. Lemiller found out that there are some nuances. The survey made it clear that people assign themselves different roles in such sex. Some see themselves as the main object, some act as equals, and there are those who represent their partner as one of the main participants. There are also those who prefer to imagine such group sex with strangers.
Oddly enough, but a study by an American psychologist found out that the "threesome" is not only the most common fantasy, but also the most overrated. Most fantasizing on this topic are seriously disappointed when faced with a threesome in real life. Most often, the problem is that no one really knows what to do and which of the participants to pay more attention to.
Psychologically, men and women are arranged differently, but their sexual fantasies are very similar. It has always been assumed that women are more romantic, but Lemiller destroys this stereotype.
For most of us, sexual fantasies remain part of the dream world. Three-quarters of the participants in Dr. Justin Lemiller's study admitted that they constantly think about how to make their fantasies come true. But most have not progressed further in this matter than thinking. Only a quarter of the respondents made any effort to make their intimate dreams come true in real life.
If we do not talk about threesome sex, which becomes a source of frustration, then most of those who decided to bring their fantasies to life were still satisfied. Dr. Lemiller writes:
So we can confidently recommend everyone not to fantasize in vain, but to try to make the most intimate dreams come true. But be careful that it doesn't turn out the way it did with Reddit users who suddenly got the opportunity to have sex in the workplace, but were forced to retire or got into an ugly situation.
Keywords: 18+ | Intimate life | Research | Psychology | Sexuality | Fantasies