"Sent a good harvest of marijuana": what Mexicans thank the saints for

Retablos are religious paintings, with the help of which Catholic saints are thanked in Latin America for being visited by good luck or trouble has passed. The canvas depicts the plot of what happened, and at the bottom it is accurately described in the text. Sometimes the artist who is ordered a retablos remains anonymous, but it is known that they are often painted by parishioners themselves. These postcards look especially naive when their themes are crime, prostitution and drug trafficking (drug dealers and other criminals even have their patron saint — Saint Jesus Malverde, not recognized by the church).

We cannot determine which of the retablos cards are really drawn for the sake of gratitude to the saints, and which ones are for entertainment, but they are beautiful in any case.

"I thank Jesus Malverde for saving me from death. When we got to California, my guide became distraught due to the large amount of drugs taken. I entrusted my fate to Jesus and was able to escape and escape. With this retablo I show that miracle. Jose P. Artist: Alfredo Vilchis, 1990".

"My son Ramiro smoked a lot of marijuana. I prayed to the Blessed Virgin of Guadalupe that he would get rid of this bad habit. And then he saw flying cats that tried to talk to him. It scared him to death, so he doesn't even think about smoking anymore. And I thank you for this miracle."

"Jesus Malverde, thank you for your protection and patronage. We spent more than an hour in a difficult confrontation, and when we almost ran out of bullets, we were able to escape unharmed, taking the goods. Pablo Aurilla. Unknown Artist, 1975".

"We thank Saint Jesus Malverde for sending us a good harvest of marijuana. We will be able to get a lot of money for it and buy ourselves cows and piglets. Juan and Josefa Mirta. Artist: Selva Prieto Salazar".

"I dedicate this retablo to the Sacred Heart of Jesus in gratitude for the fact that my wife never found out why I actually had a heart attack. At night, I spied on my sister-in-law when she went to bed.

She was undressing and taking pictures of herself on her phone. It turned me on so much that my heart couldn't stand it. I'm better now, and I'm not sorry at all. It was great, and no one will take it away from me, because what a good devil! Spying. Artist: Alfredo Vilchis, 2002".

"When I was coming back from the concert, I came across some scum who wanted to put shoes on me. But they didn't get anything from me. Then one of them pulled out a gun and put it to my head. I grabbed him, pulled out a gun, but at that time another stabbed me with a knife. I fell down and felt disgusting.

These two were clearly drugged. Then the first one raised his gun and was going to finish me off. At that moment I prayed to the Holy Archangel of Justice. Suddenly a friend of mine appeared, and these two ran away without killing me. Nice of you to stop them in time, my friend. Artist: Alfredo Vilchis".

"I thank the Lord of Willow that my husband Makario does not beat me anymore. In addition, he stopped getting drunk, and now we are very happy. Felisa Montes. 1960".

"I thank the Most Holy Virgin of Hukilian for Viagra and for getting rid of a painful illness. Now I can satisfy my spouse in bed. No means helped me, and then I trusted you and tried Viagra. Now we are very happy. I dedicate this retablo to you for saving our marriage. Roberto Coyoacan. The end of the 1990s".

"Thank you, Blessed Virgin of Guadalupe, for helping me escape during the attack on the Twin Towers on September 11, 2001. Laura Ekirtus".

"I thank the Virgin of San Juan for sending me a man who pulled me out of prostitutes and offered to marry him. Now I am very happy with him. Glory to you, Most Holy. Sofia Izquierdo Ruiz, Guadalajara, 1955".

"My neighbor's pigs devoured my cabbage. They were very voracious. I prayed to Saint Francis, and the saint performed a miracle, so my neighbor started keeping pigs in a stable. Thank you."

"I thank the Lord of Souls for driving the terrible beast away from our lands. He killed our flocks and even Christians. In gratitude, I dedicate this retablo."

"My wife heard rumors that I was flirting with a pharmacy worker. My wife was furious with jealousy and wanted to kick me out of the house. It was only thanks to the Blessed Virgin of Zapopan that I was able to calm her down and convince her that these were just dirty rumors from some old gossip girl."

"My fiancee's parents didn't like that I was visiting her, so I began to climb to her balcony secretly, using a ladder. But one night my mother-in-law knocked over the stairs when she opened the kitchen window to chase away the barking dogs. I thank the Virgin of the Rosary for the fact that my mother-in-law was deeply worried about overturning me, and now, out of guilt, she allows me to visit my fiancee whenever I want."

"I was very fat, and my cousins kept saying that with this weight I would never get married. But I didn't lose faith in The Blessed Virgin, and thanks to her, one of the most beautiful young men in the city fell in love with me, and I fell in love with him. After a beautiful engagement, we got married. He thinks I'm the most beautiful woman in the whole world. We are very happy together, and love has even helped me lose some weight, although he doesn't care at all."

"We went fishing, and our boat leaked. There were a lot of hungry sharks swimming around us. We asked for patronage from The Blessed Virgin of the Rosary, and miraculously managed to get to land before the boat sank and we were devoured by sharks. Thank you for that."

"Our elephant was always obedient, but on April 3, 1962, right before the performance, he went berserk. We thank the Virgin of Guadalupe that we were not injured and the animal eventually calmed down."

"When I was fired from my job, I was desperate and didn't know how to support my family. Then I came up with the idea of selling tacos at night. I entrusted myself to Saint Ida Thaddeus so that everything would work out for me. With his divine help, things went very well, and now I have a lot of visitors. Blessed be Saint Judas. Magdaleno Romero, Puebla."

"From the bottom of my heart, I thank the Holy Baby from Atocha for healing my right eye, which was hit by a cactus thorn. Petra Munoz, spouse, witness to that. H. Jesus Araisa. June 5, 1939, San Luis Potosi."

"Look: if I loved you for your hair, now that you're bald, I don't love you. I bring this retablo to Saint Judas Thaddeus as a sign of gratitude, because my artist friend Frida is feeling better and has found a positive attitude. Mexico, 1949".

Frida Kahlo and her lover Diego Rivera were the first to collect retables as art objects: more than 150 such postcards were collected in their house.

"I have four cats, and my fiance has five dogs. When we got married and started living together, no one wanted to give up their pets. We thank the Virgin of Zapopan for the miracle that dogs and cats do not fight and a kind of friendship has been established between them."

"Julieta Morales was fired from a brothel because she stopped being sexy because her breasts were too big. However, she managed to find a group of clients who adore when she chokes them with her breasts. She thanks Saint Helena with this retablo, because she is doing very well."

"Holy Virgin, a thousand thanks for the fact that I finally got my freedom. Big-headed. November 3, 2015, Chalko".

Francisco Robledo was shot by a tenant when he came to collect rent. He thanks Saint Francis with this retablo, because he got off with only a scratch on his arm, and that madman was arrested.