"The cat? Innocent!" furry hooligans have a powerful patron in the State Duma
If you are the owner of a cat, then be careful — your animal may soon be out of court! State Duma deputy Vitaly Milonov has taken the initiative to adopt a law securing complete impunity for cats. Given this, get ready to answer for all the tricks of the pet yourself.
Parliamentarian Vitaly Milonov, known for his extravagant bills, proposes to completely remove the blame from cats for the crimes they committed and consolidate this right by a separate law.
The State Duma deputy stressed that animals cannot be considered violators, and the entire burden of responsibility should lie on a person.
But do not rush to criticize the statesman. If you think that the maximum that a cat is capable of is urinating in sneakers or tearing a sofa, then you are deeply mistaken.
In 2018, Russia was overwhelmed by a wave of feline lawlessness, as a result of which only by a miracle people did not suffer.
For example, in Barnaul, a shaggy scoundrel grossly violated the rules for the use of household power grids by treacherously tearing off the seal on the meter. A simple examination quickly identified the culprit, and the owners of the animal had to pay 80 thousand rubles for illegal waste of electricity.
Another Siberian cat, this time from Novokuznetsk, forgot to turn off the faucet and managed to flood the children's store located on the floor below, bringing a loss of 200 thousand rubles. Of course, it was not the cat who had to take the rap this time either — the entrepreneurs recovered losses from the pet owner.
But the most dangerous act for society was committed by a cat from the city of Novomoskovsk, Tula region. A mustachioed drug courier was caught trying to smuggle 6 grams of hashish and 1.5 grams of amphetamine into a correctional colony. The prohibited substances were masterfully hidden in the collar by the owner of the animal and only the extreme vigilance of the controllers prevented the criminal.
The drug dealer cat belonged to a man currently serving time for drug possession. The former owner handed over his pet to a friend before his arrest, leaving some instructions. Now the poor beast is orphaned again and may have ended up on the street, cursing the drugs that broke his feline fate.
Despite these irrefutable facts proving the criminal nature of cats, Mr. Milonov insists on a full amnesty for four-legged criminals.
The parliamentarian himself is the happy owner of a cat and four cats. Vitaly Valentinovich is familiar with cat tricks firsthand — animals sometimes steal meat and leave piles under the door.
This is how the deputy, who selflessly loves animals, justifies any of their dirty tricks.
Keywords: State Duma | Deputy | Law | Cats | Crime