15 gifts for those you hate
The new year is not only a time of miracles. This time the crush in the queue of diets, then to overeat fatty salads with mayonnaise, and again a diets that all this evil to banish from the body. This time of despair in search of gifts.
Treat those you hate, give them something that will remind your enemies of their worthlessness, meaninglessness of existence and your comprehensive hatred.
15. Animal, which the enemy has allergies
For some it can be cats, other dogs, rabbits, mice. Any animal that causes allergies among you hated the person, would be the perfect gift. Just imagine: as soon as the pet will show its furry face out of the box, the person starts to sneeze, to cough, to gasp and to blush. And you'll stand and laugh, laugh, laugh.
We recently wrote about the ugly Christmas sweaters. Can use this material as a prompt, and you can just donate the sweater that you once gave my grandmother and you're not wearing it (Yes, we are very, very cruel). Let this sweater will be invested as much bad taste, let your Nemesis bleeds from his eyes when he unwrap the gift wrapping.
This is an inexpensive gift, but in order to revenge was more sophisticated, take this cheap book on sale. In online stores it will cost even less. It makes a wonderful gift for the person who constantly complains about his mate. Or for a couple that you have hesitated. The book describes in detail all the stages of divorce, what you need to know and how to get a divorce without a former spouse face to face. A lovely romantic gift.
Fans of the series this incredible fiction almost as much as the sick people on the mere mention. If you hated the person and feel uncomfortable talking about sex, he is shy and timid, then run to order the most nauseating book this year. Be sure to follow the reaction of the God's dandelion — the person should be confused so that the whole will be covered with red spots.
Give it only to those who really deserve it. This gift — in case of emergency. If a fat kid has turned your life to hell and he's really very, very bad man, let him weep on it over the torn clothes. Don't tell him in person that he's fat, let him do it himself.
The perfect gift not only for those who hate Justin Bieber, but also for music lovers. Let face Justin mangles your enemy, even if he convulses. Just imagine: the first thing is to see people in the morning, when off the clock, is the face of Justin Bieber. Ideally, if the alarm screaming music of Justin Bieber. Arrange hater with no life, and a branch of hell in the new year.
Someone actually collects stuffed animals. But if your enemy is not one of them, it is a wonderful decoration of his house will be the carcass of a dead animal. Especially if your enemy is a vegetarian — then the gift will be perfect. The most important thing to have stuffed was a piercing glass eyes into the soul, causing sweaty palms.
8. Subscribe to the most hated magazine
You have to know what magazines hate your enemy, but you can guess if familiar with the person. If he is vehemently opposed to gays, sign it on the Lesbian News, A Bear Life or Shemag. Magazines in the languages which he does not know, too. Even better — sign of the enemy in highly specialized journals, so every month he received a reminder that he's stupid and narrow-minded.
Give the gift of Quran, Bible or Torah. Go on, get the materials of the sect "Jehovah's Witnesses" or some hare Krishna books. If the person is an atheist — it would be a wonderful gift, most importantly, at the moment when you give, make the simple look and all the time to ask: "You do huh?"
If your enemy makes you feel, then let's looking at you, remembers his hatred. In the end, this gift will make him happy, and we just sought. For photos there are several win-win options: you can be happy, show middle finger, or to sit on the toilet. And best of all together.
If the person to whom you bad attitude, have children, make sure that they were noisy. And more. Give the enemy the offspring of harmonicas, whistles, megaphones, bells, or something that amplifies the noise from the children several times. For greater effect, throw in a gift more candy, and better chocolate, in addition to noise to your enemy got sticky spots all over the apartment.
4. Last year's gift
And don't you dare change a gift box! Don't you dare show that you somehow confuse about the gift. You can even give the same card I gave you, just fix the names, but better — change arrow. Hater will not only appreciate your sense of humor, but think what you are looking for reconciliation — you are not forgotten, that bastard gave you last year, but kept the trinket.
Nicolas cage is a fine actor, he starred in many great films, but there were failures. Movies-torture, disaster movies — "con Air", "windtalkers", "Ghost rider", "the Wicker man". Give the whole collection of these treasures to someone you really hate. Let them waste away, let them suffer.
The trend on shake weights lately gaining momentum. Someone finds them highly effective, fans of a healthy lifestyle are buying them like hotcakes. That is, you know, what is the best way to tell the enemy that he is fat? This is a wonderful occasion to emphasize how you understand the trends and ready kindness to share this knowledge.
If you want to emphasize someone's loneliness, to remind the person that every night he sleeps alone in a cold bed, buy him a pillow. No, really, he will appreciate your concern and that everyone understands what he is a worthless man. It is desirable that he was then in the pillow crying.